Twenty-five years ago today, Tim and Cyndi Smith got married and started their journey towards the greatest accomplishment of their lives: my eventual existence. But, really, it’s their big 2-5 and we are damn proud. Here are a few things we can learn from these two kids:
- Married People Do Have Sex
Morgan, how do you know this? Well, gee, let me just tell you. Picture it. I’m six years old, preparing for a rousing game of Capture the Flag with the neighbor children. But we need a flag. Mother recently introduced a rule requiring us to ask before using a dishrag, as we tended to go through approximately six a day. I search far and wide, but I can’t find her. At last, I try her bedroom door. Locked. Naturally, I grab a butter knife from the kitchen and unlock it myself. I opened the door, and my life forever changed. Was it my fault for unlocking the door? Perhaps. But it was the middle of the damn day. Christ.
- Marriage is No Cake Walk
Personally, I’ve never understood this analogy, as I’ve always found Cake Walks particularly stressful. I once got stuck with a store-bought fruitcake, so don’t tell me it’s all fun and games. But I digress. Life presents a lot of challenges. Like, a lot. And in marriage, you share those challenges. Which is nice, in theory. But what if you do things differently? What if you grieve differently? What if you cope differently? What if you handle challenges with starkly different approaches? You compromise. And that’s not easy for most of us. But you do it. Because that’s how marriage works.
- You’re Going to Want to Give Up
Through the course of my parents’ marriage, our immediate and extended family has dealt with an absolute myriad of shit. Mental and physical illness, death, addiction. The list goes on longer than the peak of our family grocery lists. Because for some of us, hell isn’t a place you go; it’s something you carry with you. And to carry such a load takes its toll. On a person, on a marriage. And it’s going to make you want to give up. On life. On love. And on a marriage. But if you can hold on, if you can fight through the hell and hold on, it’s worth it. And it’s pretty badass.
- Love Is Enough
I’ve watched my parents live through hell. I’ve watched them live it both individually and together. And I’ve watched them overcome it. Because when you love someone enough, when you truly, genuinely love the living shit out of someone—love is enough. Love is enough.
- Some People Don’t Age
Like, are you kidding me?