Oh, say can you see? By an Autumn Sunday’s sweet light? That’s right, my sweet petunias. Football season is poking her beautiful head back around that athletic corner. While we may be a devastating four months away from the real deal, in a mere few hours, sweet salvation shall come. Yes, that’s right, cupcakes: it’s… Continue reading The Real First Round: Second Edition
Bye Weeks Oh, Sweet Jesus, bye weeks. In many a football season, we dread the bye week, the loss of momentum. Saturday is the best day of the week for a reason—it’s gameday. But when you’re a 2-5 team under a coach whose face induces prolonged bouts of ire and vomit, gameday takes on a… Continue reading More Shit To Be Grateful For
In the last several days, we’ve encountered an onslaught of news regarding the sexual assault scandal at Baylor University. As I scathingly mentioned earlier this week, Art Briles was fired from his position as head coach of the Baylor University football team. Both Chancellor Kenneth Starr and Athletic Director Ian McCaw have officially resigned. It’s… Continue reading Yes, This Is Another Post About Rape. Yes, It Is Important.
I’m throwing you guys a curveball today. In terribly unfamiliar fashion, I decided to collaborate with another obscure artist, Tom Knight. An extraordinarily Caucasian former baller for our alma mater, Notre Dame, followed by a brief stint as a European professional basketball star, Mr. Knight now hosts his very own podcast, The Cause, in which… Continue reading It’s a Podcast Party
Today, is a beautiful day. Yes, the sun is shining. Yes, the birds are chirping. But it goes much further than that. Today, the dragon has been slayed. Today, Art Briles has been fired. As the public becomes privy to the intricacies of what can only be described as one of the most inconceivably atrocious… Continue reading Art Briles: Rapist
Listen up, people. It’s that time of year again. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping. And the 2016 NFL Draft is upon us. My cup runneth over. If you’re into football, you’re probably going to Mel Kiper, Jr. or Todd McShay for your draft insights. I understand. But for those slightly less invested… Continue reading The Real First Round
Are You Calling Me Fat? 